Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
