Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
worst night to have a conscience
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
