I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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