3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Randomize
