I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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