she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
