I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
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She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
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No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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