i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
