They should really pass out barf bags in church
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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