He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
