I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
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