I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
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