I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
