you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
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