yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize