Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize
