I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
