I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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