Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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