real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
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