I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize