Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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