Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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