Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Randomize
