We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize