No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
try to milk me bitch
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
