Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Will exercising make me less horny?
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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