Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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