The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
