They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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