I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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