med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
