i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I deserve this hangover.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
