Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
