Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize