we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize