if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
