i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were destined to go to rehab together
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize