I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
ugly people sure do ruin things
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
