one two three fourrrrnication!
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
