The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
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