I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
i think i scared a bird with my dick
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
