it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Randomize
