oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize