I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
