allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize