Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're earring is so big in my mouth
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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