I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
I need to stop coming to work sober
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.