toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
