Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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