Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Randomize
