I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
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